As far as sex toys go, it feels pretty bizarre for a best-seller in the category to be all about not allowing pleasure. Still, male chastity cages have been increasingly on demand for the last ten years, with new models popping up every few months: shorter, lighter, more ornate, with spikes, electrified, featuring urethral plugs, in pastel colors, and more. What they all share is the basic concept of a large ring worn at the base of the genitals—behind the testicles—onto which a cage-like element is locked, encasing the penis. The result: no erection is possible, nor masturbation and most certainly penetration neither.
Chastity cages were once a rarity even among BDSM enthusiasts, but their popularity has steadily grown, almost becoming mainstream. Not so much for their female equivalent, mostly due to the fact that despite the legends (“ancient” specimens are in fact fakes, built since the Renaissance to swindle collectors) they just don’t work. In fact, hygienic considerations make them impractical to use, and ladies can easily take their pleasure just by rubbing on them anyway. The obvious question, however, is: why are people so into doing it?
Teasing and denial, also called edging, is among the oldest games in the book, simply consisting of delaying orgasm to make arousal and desire stronger. Sexual encounters become longer and more passionate, and partners can take their time to explore a myriad of other exciting erotic games before crashing down with post-orgasmic relaxation. You can achieve this just out of sheer willpower, but adding a physical restraint can make things more interesting—or allow you to prolong the game for days and even weeks!
In fact, chastity play can appeal for several reasons. Chief among them is clearly a domination dynamic: «your pleasure belongs to me, and I am the only one to decide when you can have sex and with whom» does feel rather empowering, and a cool kinky secret to share between partners. There are however other aspects that may or may not play a role.
For certain men, a chastity cage can even be much more beneficial than it looks. Early ejaculators, for example, may experience the device as a sort of protection and support, helping them to relax for all the time required to please their partner in non-penetrative ways. Those suffering from performance anxiety may enjoy being locked as a psychological alibi not to worry about erections at all: nobody expects long, raging hard-ons when the penis is caged down!
Chastity devices are also used to enhance many cuckolding games, underlying the roles within the couple. As with all kinks, however, it is important to distinguish between the idealized extremes depicted in porn and the reality of the practice. Very few persons actually make enforced chastity a lifestyle choice: even among hardcore enthusiasts, undergoing prolonged trials like the somewhat-famous Locktober month of denial (and the subsequent No-vember, Denial December, etc.) is more the exception than the rule. This means that most widespread long-term chastity-related worries become simply irrelevant.
More specifically, a little case of blue balls won’t require any medical attention; you won’t have to learn how to “milk” the prostate; your penis won’t shrink; your erections will remain unaffected; you aren’t going to lose your desire. Any of the above might become a temporary concern only after several months of continuous encagement. If you still need to satisfy your morbid curiosity about the risks of abstinence, you can find a detailed explanation here.
What you actually must take into account is the need for frequent and thorough cleaning of the genitals, since any tight-fitting device may make moisture and dirt stick to your skin in very sensitive places. After a few days of unresolved sexual tension the further possible problem of dripping precum also makes its appearance—so reserving some additional time for personal hygiene is advisable.
Talking about real-world concerns: as iconic as padlocks can be, common sense suggests to use other ways to lock the device, or a mechanical failure (especially due to shower water or underwear lint jamming the lock) might lead to a seriously embarrassing emergency visit to your local locksmith. Single-use plastic locking tabs are a popular alternative, since they are individually numbered as a tamper-proof measure, but they can be cut open with a regular scissor in case of need.
As with every erotic game, though, the one thing to keep in mind is to have fun. Toys, roles, and practices are simply a way to enjoy our bodies and relationships, not a recipe to be blindly followed in the attempt to conform to any “expected standard”. Exploration is half the fun at the least: choosing the device you like the best, trying it on for different lengths of time and in different contexts, discovering new ways of teasing the victim and pleasing his partner, discussing what you like the best (or not)… in short, finding your own playstyle. You might find chastity is not for you after all or you may make it a steady element in your relationship. Either way, your intimacy will grow stronger through the experience—and the pleasure as well, with or without erections.
